Morning Brew: May 8

I'm gonna go against the grain and start out positive today: BC unemployment rates are the lowest they have been in over 40 years. Sure, we're all making less, addicted to more drugs, and faced with high and rising housing prices... but at least more people can support their habits via menial labor these days. Okay... that got negative fast.

I'll try and bring it back with a thousand crosses raised for lives saved by Insite. Meanwhile, the mayoral candidates band together to urge the feds to keep Insite open. It's nice to see the city unanimously supporting the program, but all this energy should be channeled towards improving the program; as DeGenova says, "we should be expanding... not fighting to keep the one open." Alas.

Church sandwich-handout program shut down, because homemade sandwiches might make someone sick? Versus a diet of 7-11 smokies and pizza crusts? And what does starvation do to the system again? Ridiculous.

After their recent multi-million dollar deal to become the official paper of the 2010 Games, Globe and Mail president John Furlong actually said "it's implied that 60 per cent of the headlines will be 'Those VANOC guys are super-great.'"

Oilpatch injuries are more severe and costly than those in any other sector. Hmmm... maybe God is telling us something? Stay out! Stay out boy!

Monkeynapping and monkey murder at the Aldergrove zoo. These two are for the monkeys.

Is raw milk safe? Time has more into a question we looked at a few Brews ago. I think drinking another animal's breast milk is kinda nasty... unless its mixed with sugar, stirred and frozen. Peanut butter cups? Yes.

All the news coming out of the taser inquiry seem pro-'nonfatal electric shock'. I'm not the only one who noticed. Stay up to date at truthnottasers.

As I was searching for taser news, I stumbled upon this quote, from a post that's been circulating a little on the web, supposedly written by an American man who bought a taser for his wife, then took it for a test-drive:

[..]I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . . . HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . . WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . . WHAT THE HELL!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs?

The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

See. He's alive to talk about it. And another reminder to make sure you always have that emergency $2.50. Last minute update: The Tyee has a good report up on one journalist's attempt to get tasered. Gleaned: most of those taser studies we keep hearing about are funded by Taser International.

Last night we had our first BR meet-up with the new team. It was at the Cambie. There was beer. There were no laptops. Someone mentioned liveblogging and I slapped them. We talked about good things, and the future here looks positive. Stay tuned.

We are all little fishes in an infinity aquarium.

photo courtesy of essential local photographer, The Blackbird